SBCC Relational Development T

Question 1: CH 7 Relational Development: Managing Dialectical Tensions

Review PP lecture (Module Week 11) and reread pp. 219-222. Also see Activity p. 231.

  1. Identify and describe an interpersonal relationship in your life where there currently exists a struggle between each person’s need for either autonomy or connection, transparency or privacy, novelty or predictability.
  2. Explain how this dialectical tension affects the relationship. Give examples that show understanding of both parties.
  3. Based on this relationship, consider which methods might be useful for managing the dialectical tension. Explain how you would use this method with the person with whom you experience this dialectical tension. In other words: a) explain what you perceive the problem to be, b) suggest a method from pg. 222, c) explain how you would accomplish your part of the strategy: what would you say (verbal )and do (nonverbal) differently?
  4. How do you think the other person would react? What might be the result?

(METHODS:Denial, Disorientation, Selection, Alternation, Segmentation, Moderation, Reframing, Reaffirmation.)

Question 2: CH 8 Relational De-Escalation: Break-ups

Review Lecture (Week 12 Module) and reread pgs. 235-250 in text

Think of one of the most significant “break ups” you have ever experienced, either in a romantic relationship, a friendship or with a family member.

  1. Write a short paragraph explaining what happened. How long had you known one another and how long had you been in an interpersonal relationship? Why did the break up happen? Using this narrative (which is from your point of view) apply the concepts from this chapter.
  2. Was the break up unilateral or bilateral? Explain
  3. Was the breakup strategy direct or indirect? Describe the behaviors that led to this distinction. Name the specific breakup strategy (pg. 250) and explain what happened.
  4. Consider Transgressions and Social Exchange theory in your responses – Use examples. What Were the Cost/Rewards in the relationship?
  5. After reading this chapter what would you do differently or the same? Be specific.

Question 3: Ch 9 Conflict Management And Chapter 10 Helpful and Unhelpful Behavior -(Synthesize competent communication behaviors throughout the textbook. You should focus on the below concepts and skills.

Skills: Demonstrate communication competence in this reflective analysis by considering and addressing, the different Conflict Approaches, “I” language, Perception checking, Gibbs Supportive and Defensive Behaviors, the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse and/or Active Listening.


Instructions: Reflection Helpful / Unhelpful Communication/ behavior

Recall two memorable conflict situations in which you did not behave in a way that helped minimize or resolve the conflict. Fill out the following Conflict Awareness Log to help you identify effective strategies to use in the future when you are called on to help resolve interpersonal conflicts.

  • In column 1, briefly describe the incident.
  • In column 2, explain your unhelpful communication actions and the reason(s) for your unhelpful behavior.
  • In column 3, describe what you wish you’d said or done to help resolve the situation.

Briefly describe the incident.

Explain your unhelpful communication behaviors.

Explain your actions or the reason(s) for your unhelpful behavior

Describe what you could have done, or wish you’d said or done to help resolve the situation. Label the skills based on course terms. Use specific examples and suggestions.

Example 1

Example 2

Question 4: Overall Reflection Chapters. 1-10

  1. Describe an important specific concept you’ve learned in this course (Hint: go through the bold faced and italic words from Chapters 1-10. You may not use the broad chapter headings e.g. nonverbal communication, verbal communication etc. nor may you use the skills of Perception Checking or ‘I’ language, Dialectical Tensions, Types of Break-ups or Individual Conflict Styles). What is the concept? (Other oriented Communication:Self Oriented behavior with other oriented behaviors) Define it in your own words. Explain why you think it is important in terms of being a more competent communicator. Provide examples which demonstrate your mastery of skills described in the textbook.
  1. How do you plan to use this concept to improve your communication in a current, specific interpersonal relationship in your life.
  1. Give support, examples and evidence of how you will integrate it. Incorporate course terminology and concepts.

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